Finding Equilibrium





Our neighbors are loudly quarreling tonight. I am not sure what it is all about, it's been 30 minutes now and they are still having a discussion.

It is a good reminder for me to keep quiet, as I could also talk loudly and not mind if anybody hears! Lol!

Good thing they continue to communicate because they get to release whatever feelings and emotions they have of each other. 

When my husband and I would argue, he tends to go to his corner and bottle it all up inside. Totally my opposite. If I need to say something, I say it. I am not the type who would silently cradle my feelings. I need to let it out, and once I do that, I'm good. I could forget about it already.

I like it too if he'd talk it out, because I could be a slow learner when it comes to understanding what's wrong. I'd usually choose my battles and not sweat the small stuffs. Well, apparently those small stuffs would get on his nerves and would be the cause of the big fight stuffs. Lol.

Well, the voices upstairs have lowered down. Good. At least they are now beginning to understand, I hope, and settle their differences.

My husband would usually need to sleep it off before he could let out his hurt feelings.

So the rule of marriage, to never go to sleep with an argument unsettled doesn't apply to us. Lol.

As much as I want things to be settled instantly, I can't. 

I have to respect his healing time and since he needs time-out, I just need to give it to him.

Well in 12 years, thank God for our neighbors upstairs, I just realized... I am always the cause why my husband wants time-out! Lol!

Peace be with him. Lol!

As for our neighbors, they are still talking... I hope they find peace too soon! 


-day 238


26 comments:

  1. Silence is also a factor why I an my wife has keep our relationship in a bright note. Though there were times na hindi mapigil ng misis ko to shout out loud her feelings. Me, When those situations arise, lumalabas na lang ako ng bahay, then come back if cooler heads prevail.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I respect your method or style of settling your misunderstanding with your hubby. My point here, whatever the approaches every couple may employ in "finding equilibrium" when they're in trouble, is a solution and reconciliation is reached without reservation or harboring of grudge between the husband and the wife.

    ReplyDelete
  3. what really keeps a marriage is faith in God. If you two have this then definitely humbleness, forgiveness and love follows.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Every couple is unique but I'm sure you've always found compromises in between those 12 years of marriage.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Nawala ata yung #8 dun...san napunta? Ano kaya yun? Anyway communication is the keyword for MARRIED COUPLES.

    ReplyDelete
  6. That's why I'm scared of marriage. I'm very emotional and not sure if I can handle heated arguments or silent treatments that well. :(

    ReplyDelete
  7. That don't sleep without settling an argument is really tough to follow; sometimes, individuals need more time to collect their thoughts. It's not fair to put a time limit to it, I think.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I've been with my boyfriend for four years now and as much as I want to end fights right away (like you), it's just can't. In our relationship, I'm the one who goes on silent mode when things go wrong. I believe you don't have to pressure each other to be okay, it comes naturally. Fortunately though, our fights never last for more than 24 hours. It's nice that you respect your husband's healing time, I guess other people should do that too more often. :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. I maybe a gay and jolly person. I got a strong personally too. But not sure, when it comes to my husband, I just can't talk about how I feel specially when I didnt like what he did or if i'm hurting.. I just keep my silence and sometimes just cry. Haha! Arte ko ba? I am not the type to be first to open up. But when he notices im quiet, he knows there's something wrong already.

    ReplyDelete
  10. There is the physical component where stress may affect the way people communicate or argue. It may boil down to uncontrolled temper. Not that I am siding with your husband but sometimes sleeping it off can pay off with a more controlled situation and argumentation later :D

    ReplyDelete
  11. It can be very frustrating for a talkative person like me to argue with a person who is not saying anything. Ahh...the ways of men.

    ReplyDelete
  12. we all have our ways of doing things. just have to live with what makes him that way.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Sadly many couples don't practice this and that includes me. As much as I want to argue and have discussions, my husband opts to quiet down and ignore the issue. I know there will be repercussions of this in our relationship but I just pray that I continue to have that patience I've been holding on.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Buti nalang singela pa rin ako ngayon. enjoy sa buhay!

    ahay ganyan talaga ata ang mga babae.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Sana I'll always remember this ... minsan kasi I become irrational when I am mad.

    ReplyDelete
  16. This reminds me of what I've listened earlier morning, The kerygma show. The speaker said that a women talks more than men. Per day, women speaks 6000 words. So, If a couple have an argument and the women is still talking, "baka daw hindi pa nakakaboundary si misis" the speaker said. LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  17. If Im mad, i just keep quiet and don't talk to hubby for hours and even dyas, depending on my mood and he let can't take it.He knows me and when I am ready to tal,k then we talk ang explain our sides.

    ReplyDelete
  18. This is actually refreshing to read, as this was what my grandma used to tell us before she passed away.. to never sleep without settling an argument. My beau and I, although not married yet, try not to sleep until we do fix things. And when things do get settled, sleep feels much more relaxing and more at peace.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I thinks most of the ladies tends to voice out their emotions say whatever they gonna say when their outrage. I believe most of the guys master to shut his mouth and find solitude before facing the angry wife which I always did. Both must compromise and should say sorry afterwards.

    ReplyDelete
  20. giving space and time are also one of the few key points why my boyfriend and I easily talk things through, and try to search for possible solutions to make our relationship work.

    ReplyDelete





  21. married for only 10years, i can say that i still have so much to learn and discover.. having an argument with your spouse is but normal, and as you grow more secured with each others love, you will not be shaken by it. Yahweh bless







    ReplyDelete
  22. I guess every women has always the tendency to shout out what she feels, most women are outspoken than men.. like my mom.. growing up with such.. ahhhhh! stressful days

    ReplyDelete
  23. Same with you... we can sleep without patching things up yet but I can hardly fall into deeper one because I know something is wrong with us. But giving time to think and get the anger subside truly help us to avoid long arguments that eventually hurt each others feeling more. I believe in TIME OUT. It's more effective.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Time and space, Every couple must know when to talk things out and when to keep quiet. Women should also learn how not to nag during arguments :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. Well, you need to have things settled before going to sleep, especially when settling after a fight. Moreover, don't make decisions or say anything bad when angry. Unexpected things might happen.

    ReplyDelete
  26. what nice insights! you and your husband will be okay.

    ReplyDelete

My Dailies Collection